Alcuin

[poison_isley]

Ivy had been out, on her best behaviour, and she'd come across the grand opening of a bakery. They had a few vegan things and upon trying them decided they were good enough to share. She bought a box and headed straight for Hannibal's office, sure he deserved a treat.

"Hey!" she called as she stepped into the office, then cringed. Oh, right. The boyfriend. He had an office, too.

"Sorry," she whispered loudly.

Comments

[alcuin]

Alcuin looked genuinely surprised, and he actually thought for a moment that she was going to start laughing - ha, I got you! - but she didn't.

He'd been polite. He'd wanted her to like him.

His face went from surprise to practiced neutrality. "Hannibal is very fortunate to have such loyal friends," was all he said.

[poison_isley]

"Yeah...not really," she drawled, sitting back. "Most people would be smart not to befriend the 'criminally insane'," Ivy added, with air quotes.

[alcuin]

"I believe that we are all much more nuanced than the labels placed on us," said Alcuin. "I am not the sort of man Hannibal should have befriended either, based on labels."

[poison_isley]

"Eh, maybe he just has good taste," she smirked. "Gotta pick your criminal friends real careful, you know what I mean?"

[alcuin]

"Indeed," said Alcuin. "When he met me I was being accused of murder. Would you like some tea? I think I'll put on a fresh pot." He stood.

[poison_isley]

"Yeah, but did'ja do it?" she called after him, barely even turning her head.

[alcuin]

"No," Alcuin said. "I didn't kill him." Others, of course...

He turned the kettle on. "But I trust Hannibal to have good judgment."

[poison_isley]

"I don't even know how many people I've killed," she said, much as if she were talking about the weather.

[alcuin]

Alcuin suddenly thought Hannibal might have downplayed some things about Ivy. Or maybe he hadn't considered that Alcuin might meet her this soon. Or perhaps she was on her best behavior with Hannibal...

"And on a scale of one to ten, how likely do you think you are to kill me?" he asked mildly as he got a tea bag and slipped it into a cup.

[poison_isley]

"Right now? Zero," she smiled. "In general, two. On a bad day? Ten," she said.

[alcuin]

"And Hannibal?" asked Alcuin.

[poison_isley]

"He'd really have to piss me off," she laughed lightly. "He's like...negative five. Him and Klaus, and a handful of others."

[alcuin]

Klaus. That wasn't a common name... But of course Alcuin didn't comment on it.

"Is there anything I might do to get into your good graces?" he asked, pouring water into the tea cup.

[poison_isley]

Ivy settled into the chair a little and leaned back, giving him genuine, careful appraisal.

"Did you do it?" she asked. "Because I bet you killed him."

Ivy made friends in the strangest ways. Always with the prickles first.

[alcuin]

"Why do you think so?" Alcuin asked calmly. He sat back down in the chair and crossed his legs.

[poison_isley]

"Because no one, no one is actually that fucking zen," she said. "And if you didn't kill him? I'll bet you a million dollars you've done some sketchy shit."

[alcuin]

Alcuin's lips quirks. "I actually find Hannibal to be remarkably zen." Some people found it unnerving, even.

[poison_isley]

"Yeah, well you can't smell him like I do," she smiled deviously.

"He's disciplined, but he isn't zen. Not inside."

[alcuin]

Alcuin could see that. Hannibal had a great deal of passion under the surface.

"Would you like me better or worse if I'd killed someone?" Alcuin asked curiously, though he thought he knew the answer.

[poison_isley]

"I dunno. What else have you got going for you?" Ivy asked, smiling a little less sinister.

[alcuin]

Alcuin shrugged. "I mean, you were right that I've done sketchy shit. At least as far as most people are concerned."

[poison_isley]

"See? I knew it. And now I'm a million richer," she smirked.

[alcuin]

"Mmmm I wouldn't have denied it," Alcuin said. "My past is only a google search away." He took a sip of the tea. "Of course, you'll also find some speculation that I murdered Hannibal, and clearly that one isn't true."

[poison_isley]

"Mmm, now, see? There? That would have gotten you dead," she said. "I like you, dude. You've got a quick mind, and you're good at your job. You use degradable tea bags and you keep the lights off. Good for your carbon footprint..."

And then she sat forward and put her cup down.

"But don't think I'd be friends with you if you weren't with my friend. Don't ever make me pick a side."

[alcuin]

"I won't," Alcuin assured her. "As I said, I'm happy that Hannibal has friends." He might have wondered if Ivy had a crush on Hannibal, but given how readable she'd been about Aaron, he thought that was less likely. "I'm not suggesting we go shopping together. Unless you'd like to."